I went to college at Western Washington University from 2003-2005. I followed my older brother there and from him I learned about the "Shalom Center" - which is now called the Newman Center - it was the Catholic Campus Ministry for the university. It was a vibrant community of young Catholics who were passionate about their rich faith. During my first year, I went with a group of Catholics to see Fr. Corapi in Vancouver. Ironically enough, we happened to stay the night in the youth center of Fr. Lappe's old parish in Camas. On this weekend I learned a lot. Fr. Corapi was amazing - but what resonated with me the most was getting to know the fellow Catholics I traveled with - particularly the men. On the first night, before we went to bed, the men decided they wanted to pray for all the women in our group. So they formed a circle and faced outward, while the women made a larger circle around them and faced inward. The women rotated around and each man prayed for us individually. Each man poured out his heart in whispered prayers for our purity and our holiness.
These men were of a different caliber than other men I have seen in the world. This gave me a glimpse of what men are supposed to be like when they live up to their vocation in following Jesus and being holy men of God.
Their influence encouraged me to reserve my heart for my future husband and to wait for a man who would treat me as Christ treats the Church:
Wives should be subject to their husbands as to the Lord, since, as Christ is head of the Church and saves the whole body, so is a husband the head of his wife; and as the Church is subject to Christ, so should wives be to their husbands, in everything.
Husbands should love their wives, just as Christ loved the Church and sacrificed himself for her to make her holy by washing her in cleansing water with a form of words, so that when he took the Church to himself she would be glorious, with no speck or wrinkle or anything like that, but holy and faultless.
In the same way, husbands must love their wives as they love their own bodies; for a man to love his wife is for him to love himself. A man never hates his own body, but he feeds it and looks after it; and that is the way Christ treats the Church, because we are parts of his Body.
This mystery has great significance, but I am applying it to Christ and the Church.
Ephesians 5: 22-32
This passage was read at a wedding that I witnessed last year and I noticed some of the women in the pews glancing at each other and touting "the look." And at the reception I overheard those same women discussing the reading and scoffing at the perceived message.
I think these women heard the first line and tuned out for the rest of the passage. Take another look at the part in bold - Who wouldn't want to be subject to a man who loves you enough to sacrifice himself entirely for your purity and holiness? Granted, all men fall short of this lofty ideal - but that points to the beauty of the woman's vocation - to submit herself in support to her husband in order to help him in his role of sacrificial leadership. After all, it is discouraging to lead when no one will follow you.
"e5 Men" is an organization of men around the world who are striving to live out their vocation as detailed in Ephesians 5. Through fasting, they offer prayers for their wives, women sinned against by men, and all women in general. I hope that more men will continue to join in order to provide healing for any hurt that has come from those not striving to uphold the dignity and purity of the opposite sex.
I personally want to thank all the men in my life who have been a great witness to me of sacrificial love - the men from the Shalom Center, my brother, my father, and most of all - my dear husband! I praise God for placing these men in my life and showing me His love through them.
May we all keep striving to lift each other up in a supportive and sacrificial way so that each of us will share in the joy of Christ's love for all eternity.
